"Hey, It’s me again. I don’t know if you’ll ever read this. Maybe this is just me screaming into a void that never echoes back. But writing this makes me feel closer to you somehow. Like you’re still out there, just a few pages away, like I could reach through the words and pull you back into my life. It’s been a while. And even now, even after all this time, I still miss you like it happened yesterday. People keep saying time heals everything, but they never say what to do when time just stretches the pain instead of softening it. You think I forgot you, don’t you? You think I moved on, or that I’m doing just fine. But the truth is— I still think about you. Every. Single. Day. Every time I hear a love song, every time I see two people laughing like we used to, I think of you. Sometimes I even catch myself smiling at something you once said, and then it hits me like a wave— You’re not here. You’re not mine anymore. And maybe you never really were. I keep wondering: In some other world, are we still together? Are we still sharing playlists, playing chess at 2AM, laughing about stupid things only we found funny? In some alternate timeline, are we happy—without the distance, the silence, the ache? But the worst part is… I don’t want this love to exist only in a parallel universe. I want it here. I want it now. I want the real you, not a memory, not a daydream. I want to fight for us, even if I already lost you. Do you remember when I asked you to read that story aloud, just so I could keep hearing your voice? I still have the audio. I still listen to it sometimes when everything feels too heavy. And even though you might have stopped thinking about me, your voice still feels like home. Maybe you’ve found someone new. Maybe there’s another girl now—another person who makes you laugh the way I did, who plays chess with you, who hears the voice I miss more than anything. And I know it’s selfish… But I hope you haven’t. I hope I still mean something. Because you still mean everything to me. I didn’t leave because I stopped loving you. I left because I didn’t know how to stay. Because I was scared. Because I didn’t want to drag you into my mess, my brokenness. But now I wonder if I made a mistake. If I walked away from something that was once the only good thing I had. And I hate myself for it. I hate myself for choosing silence over love. Distance over hope. When I think of you now, I still see us. The late-night conversations, the stupid jokes, the deep talks. The way we dreamed about the future, about how easy it would be if love was enough. And I still wish it could be. I wish life didn’t get in the way. I wish we were old enough to just run away from it all and make our own kind of forever. But we’re not. Not yet. So all I can do is hope. If you’re reading this, please, just leave me a sign. Post something, even a song lyric—something only I’d notice. Let me know you still remember. Let me know I’m not crazy for still holding onto this. Let me know I wasn’t the only one who saw something real in us. Because no matter how much time passes, you’re still my first real love. And even if we never find our way back to each other, I’ll carry you with me—quietly, painfully, but always. You were never just a chapter. You were the whole story. And maybe one day, we’ll pick it back up and write the ending we deserved. Until then… I’ll be waiting for your sign. Always, Suvi"

this still agonizes my heart, since we broke up, i have been only chasing her every singgle way, improved myself did everything, but in the end it goes down to her either seeing me enough, i dont think she ever thought i was enough, regardless i love her.